MAKE UP GAME: Fierce and Fantastic
The Hudson Dusters vs. We’ve Got The Runs (Final Score 10-12)
Our Final Regular Season Record: 5-2 (but technically, and in our hearts, we are 6-1)
For the record, we had ALREADY won when we started this fiercely fantastic game due to their lack of spirit at our last faceoff and inability to produce any women for the game. But we were good sports and agreed to grace them with our kickball brillance for a second time.
The weather was a cruel devil the morning of our slated DOUBLE HEADER, with lightening strikes and thunderclaps and sheets of rain. A few brave Dusters ventured out into the storm to the CARBS + BOOZE = WINNERS pump-up session at Red Thunder and Mr. Gowan’s house. Home Bass (renamed for the day as Nathan “Bases” Loaded), Commando, Bulleit, and Tabasco pounded bagels and bloody marys, securing a liquored glaze for the game. It seemed the more we boozed, the more afraid the weather became of us and finally, the SUN CAME OUT and we hustled up to Peter’s Field.
The ref was late, which gave us a few extra minutes to stretch out our burly quads and bulging biceps. We were up first, scoring 4 runs right off the bat and scaring the living feces out of the other team. Great coaching, solid kicks, and great base running kept the runs flowing (but our shorts dry). Our eyebrows were raised when Liver Die placed a long boot into a puddle in Left Field and the chica, wearing a bandana still bloody from her daddy’s time in Nam, actually dove into the puddle for it. We knew we were in for a serious game.
Our outfield- Mr. Gowan, Tall Boy, and Biggie Balls- were like the Great Wall of China, not letting anything past. Home Bass made some grizzly pop-fly catches as shortstop and Road Runner felt the satisfying thhhhhh-unk of a crucial pop up in the infield. At the plate, we had great kicks by Biggie Balls, Mr. Gowan, Tall Boy and Scary Anne, and our first HOME RUN of the season by Liver Die…bringing in 2 runs with his mega-shooter.
We were up 7-5 in the third inning and the other team was nervous. Red Thunder and Home Bass made a Duster Sandwich (Thunder-OUT-Bass) working shortstop and 2nd base. Liver Die caught a line drive to 3rd and made a perfect throw to Scary Anne at 1st for a killer double-play. Commando was unrattled by their team Ogre, who stamp-dragged his foot like a bull when he was at the plate (he was also wearing black gloves that said NFL on them….PUH-LEASE).
Unsavory moment: When their 1st basemen said to Red Thunder (who was coaching 1st base): I WILL FUCKING RUN YOU OVER IF YOU STAND THERE. I WILL FUCKING RUN YOU OVER.
Savory moment: When Liver Die pegged his crazy ass when he slipped off 3rd base.
SHOUT OUT to Tabasco who served as team papparzzi, morale booster, and team nurse! Thanks for the great pictures, water and Advil!!
When their pitcher wasn’t doing ‘roids in the dugout, he was busy throwing (not rolling) balls across the plate.
It was a great game, we played hard, and we gave it our all. When we rumble against them in the playoffs next week, we will GIVE THEM THE RUNS….and crush them…and make them cry….and then do a cheer for them: “2,4,6,8…who did we just eliminate? THE RUNS!”
4Square and Turkey Leg, we can’t wait for you to be back on the field for the playoffs!!
